Win a copy of Shaun Palmer's The Miserable Champion DVD!
We’ve got five copies of the Shaun Palmer DVD to give away to five miserable people!
To win a copy, simply tell me in the comments below why you are so miserable and why winning a copy will cheer you up so much! Ahhh, a lovely cheerful competition!
(I’m only going to post these DVDs to UK addresses, have you seen the cost of stamps these days?!)









I put a rather substantial hole in my knee at the weekend, riding a track I’ve ridden hundreds of times…This after breaking my elbow 2 weeks before the mega (also on a track i’ve ridden literally hundereds of times) and having to cancel my entry…this summer has been shite
Spooky, you’ve just won yourself a copy!
I’ve been waiting 2 weeks for my new Jekyll and it still hasn’t turned up. No trails for 2 weeks! Help me out please!
a new bike on it’s way – a 2 week wait? some people wait a lifetime – you are not miserable, just inconsiderate.
This. Waited for my Tallboy LTc for three months.
eheh I’m racing since “The Palm” was riding a stars and strips Specialized,:), almost every year since than I manage to broke a bone or worse at the very beginning of the season…but I will never give up! The DVD will cheer me up remind me the good old times when athletes were like rock stars and the party was the main event in the event!
becouse i am so hungover
albert i am not being funny but its Thursday afternoon – why are you hungover? that’s not a reason that’s just ridiculous, don’t bother replying i won’t read it
He’s Polish. What do you expect?
Because I’m stuck in the office from 9-6! Just as it gets close to home time the day light fades within 10 minutes, meaning that my mtbing activities recently have been confined to razzing my 45lbs Orange Patriot around the streets of Leeds avoiding taxis, buses and beery students… NIdderdale, Gisburn and Dalby are all so close but too dark to ride
Im getting married on wednesday and im having to photograph my own wedding as our photographer has let us down. So im pretty bloody miserable.
that’s not a reason to be miserable, inform your best man or another guest they have an important job to do. There – i have made you and your future wife happy, you are no longer miserable.
Woohoo, fantastic! Cheers!
clever, but certainly not miserable enough.
I’m so miserable I’m known as Les… Having this dvd of a dude that is considerably better than me at everything (but is still ‘miserable’) will make me happy…. I think…
good joke but it will be wasted on most people, clearly you are not miserable if you can pull that out ya bag of tricks.
just slightly presumptuous .
Because I’m sat in work looking out at clear blue sky’s and I can’t ride my bike. Got 8 more days before I can get out and ride. Need a DVD to cheer me up.
Having lost three mates over the last 6 weeks this would seriously cheer me up.
should have gone to specsavers.
Because my bike is cracked in 2 places
Would you post to an ROI address? I would have to wait until Xmas to get it, further making me miserable!
Hi DIRTYS ! Its Easy, because on my last Race this year i had a good seeding run. after that i go to the rider Party one day before the Finals. Drinking all the Night. Have Bad SE$ with Women. And oversleep my race start…. is this good to win the dvd ? i think YES ! and i pay the stamp for you
cheers
Jerome you are clearly from another country – and obviously not miserable as you got drunk, had sex and put a smile face on the post.
I don’t have a DH bike yet, I need motivation to save harder.. this DVD would be just the ticket!!
I had to move to Suffolk, it’s flat, in 2 years I’ve not met anyone that owns a mountain bike. Work has run out, house is cold, fuel prices going up. My wife has just come home with a bar of chocolate to cheer me up with only one piece left.
I don’t normally consider myself a fair weather rider, but with a front tyre by DMR that tends to go walkies fairly often and a lot of work at uni, I haven’t been able to go riding. But saying that, I did go for a quick blast around the streets here, ripped open my leg (quite high up; not a place I’m posting photos of online) when I dropped some steps into a low wall. With a group of very good looking, yet unsympathetic, ladies watching. I had to limp a long way home, only to realise that I’d been going the wrong way for 10 minutes. And so had to walk past said ladies again. Plus wetherspoons is the only place around here with cider on tap.
Because i thought he was gonna win this year Sea Otter Dual Slalom because i´m an old guy and i didn´t knew anyone else who was racing
oh. i´m also miserable because i´m from spain and i can´t win the dvd
im miserable cos i know too much ,ignorance is bliss.
big heads are never miserable and if they are it serves them right.
I haven’t won anything, ever, and I’m there for one reason only: To make up the numbers. I’m the face of alcoholism, the beginning of it… I’m miserable like Palmer, but I have the athletic ability of a newt. I take my non-competing time very seriously, and I’d like to enjoy this vid, it looks ace!
Andrew, tonights your lucky night…come on down…you are a winner…no longer just a number…you are now a number with a prize…a Shaun Palmer prize! (Well as long as you live in the UK!)
Not sure why I am bothering entering this competition as I never win anyway, which led to myself drinking all day long waiting for an email to pop up…
drinking all day? you should be happy, not miserable.
Well, where do I start? May I start by referencing everything I have ever written for or on this website; be it my published articles or my satirical prose on other people’s articles. I’m sure that the majority of the peole that have read anything that I have written will agree that I’m a miserable sod, that just wishes the whole MTB world would go back to sometime circa 2004, when riding bikes was fun and I was ocnsidered cool amongst my peers. Alas, it would seem that the riding world has progressed, and I am sat here, back in the stone-age, awaiting for history to repeat itself so I can be cool again.
.
Watching Mr Palmer would take me back to a time when 24″ wheels were the next best thing, 660mm bars were considered wide, and I was a srcuffy and happy little dirt urchin, riding my bike off every pile of mud
I’m so miserable that I would moan and bitch about winning , heck I won’t even watch the video all thru , i’ll skip most of it and then come on here and complain about it.
that’s just being inconsiderate, not miserable!
I’m been miserable this week as iv had a jaw infection, meaning that I could not go to see John bishop live that was a Christmas present last year, from my Fiancé, who lovingly sent me a photo to of my front row seat. Just to rub it in!
I’ll give it to my mate Andy (with the fox eye). Lost his eye a few years back and now just lost his job. He loves everything extreme and the legend Palmer is just the guy to cheer him up!
Win a copy of Shaun Palmer’s The Miserable Champion DVD!: We’ve got five copies of the Shaun… http://t.co/Ux4vDyy6
I just turned 44 years old the other week, Palmer was the one who got me into DH all them years ago, he was and still is my idol, I would like to see if he is an old miserable git, just like me.
Because I’m old and ride an old bike, don’t like new technology especially 29ers, which I’ve never tried, and I’m old
Darren that’s no reason to be miserable, at least you have a bike. And age should be appreciated, at least you got there.
You should give me a copy I was riding my moto in the forist and coming in too a down hill left hander was inside (on my side of the road) give her big down shift bit of back brake to get her drifting (doing about 60 ks) and some dick was coming the other way rong side of the road we hit think my nee hit his fork leg broken thema smashed it like glass so meny screws reattached both tendons and screwed the cartlige back together I’m gutted after training so hard was open men nz nat champ last year first year in pro and was going too be done the us world cups but now I will only just be walking
Something strang happen but I’ll be lucky if I’m walling buy xmass I live in nz but super happy to pay post thanks bro
because i got my ass beat by some snotty little juniors this year on just about every track despite my training.
Dodger, you deserve a copy for your amphetamine fuelled comment responses!
Billy – you are the man. My sincere apologies to all, i hope that i helped show you how good you actually have it.
Billy you will see that I am trying really hard – throw me a bone will you?
I should win a copy because I have recently injured my ACL on my good leg and will need surgery for the 5th time.
What makes it even more depressing is that I was 17 stone last April and got down to ~14 stone before the crash and now I am unable to exercise properly until my knees sorted….
To make it worse I have £7.12 left in my overdraft and I am now being made unemployed as of next month. Also my ex-girlfriend slept with my best mate when I was 20 and I still haven’t really got over that….(I’m 34 now)
Yours Sincerely
The Miserable Chump
being unable to train will assist in losing more weight, that will make you happy and less miserable. Well done and move on. She wasn’t all that anyway but i had to try her because you were bragging – sorry, i hope this apology cheers you up in re-hab.
Nice effort, I’d almost buy you a copy myself.
paypal ?
I was replying to the chump, you are just mean.
Chump, you poor sod! Send me your address and I’ll float a DVD your way.
Ever since my faithful Mondraker broke in an accident involving a combine harvester, a strawberry milkshake and the shortsighted police man, I’ve been a shadow of a man.
I can’t ride; I can’t polish it’s shiny shiny downtube; I can’t even moan on forums about very important mid-stroke small bump responsiveness issues with my shock any more. All I do is sit at home and listen to my collection of Leonard Cohen LPs and weep. It’s only a matter of time before I end up taking up cyclocross.
Please can I have a DVD, before it’s too late.
I’m miserable cos i’m never going to be as cool as Palmer with big name bike sponsors and my own range of snow products. I love to ride and I love to ski, I spend all summer riding and all winter skiing in France, but I’m never going to be as fast as Palmer. That makes me miserable. I love tattoo’s too, but i’m never goning to be as cool as Palmer and get Cadillac tatt’s all over my legs. I love punk rock too, but I’m never going to be cool enough to wear a black flag t-shirt, though I may get a black flag tattoo, for Keith, not Rollin’s. But that would make me miserable when I’m older and its scared onto my skin.
im miserable because ive got a min wage job the dos’nt allow me to ride at the weekends or buy shinny new parts plus im still slower then my rich friends on there new intense’s and their super new technolgy
Please can I have a copy,my forks, bar, stem and front wheel got nicked off my bike the other day and the brake fluid has wrecked the paint on my frame.
The brake was pulled off from the hose at the lever.
Screw it, wouldn’t be able to play it anyway as I have a top loading Videostar
I am miserable because my feet are cold. My hands are cold too. I’m always cold. What’s that about? I’ve also got loads of work to do. And that interrupts riding too. And it’s getting dark in the evenings, and soon the clocks will go back and it will get even darker. And then it will get colder. And I don’t have enough money. I wish I had more money, then I could buy fire, which would warm up my hands, which are colder now cos I had to take them out of my pockets to write this comment. God hates me. But he doesn’t really exist. Science hates me. My hands are cold.
lmao!! that’s so funny dude
Mark, you’ve just won the last Palmer DVD.
I think Radiohead are cheerful
my wife has just written off her mx5 and the funds i have saved all year for a new bike are now going on a replacement
I broke my back nine years ago and due to the hospital being useless. It’s still broken fractures in the L2 & L3 and possible damage to at least 4 discs. Currently waiting for an MRI and am unable to ride for the foreseeable future so much so I’ve sold 2 of my bikes.
If I don’t win can I just have a cuddle?
Cause I got I’ll the day before the trans provence and couldn’t go. Still gutted!
I’m miserable because you can’t just download this on the iTunes. DVD? It would make me even more miserable dusting down that old thing
just checked my bank account and I’m £500 quid over my over draft, I’m skint !
Im miserable due to selling my frame to buy a 223 frame online which never turned up even though the seller seemed super genuine. Then to top it off the company i worked for went bust so its taken me over a year to save for another bike and i thought i would have it built by this weekend only to find that i bought the wrong sized rear disc adapter and im too skint to buy another one until next week. Also my anti-depressants have stopped working so they have just put me on the highest dose.
i work as the bike mechanic for a well known high street shop that sells bikes along side automotive spares! i am resigned to work in a cold and dark warehouse on some bikes that should be scrapped as opposed to be brought back from the brinks of the scrapyard in the sky! the thoughts of riding with my son at weekends and making memories for the future along with sharing bike dvds past and present are what stops me being totally miserable!
went for a ride on Saturday and got snake bites front and rear at the same time. only had one tube with me and didnt have any glue for my patches. 6 miles is a long way when your walking.
I’m miserable due to not having time to get out on DH bike or any other bike since July. Worse is watching kids on there bikes while I push the pram
Miserable because i have to lay concrete in the pissing down rain all week.A DVD would sort those blues out.
I was feeling pretty miserable about work taking over my life, reaching the masters age, my DH bike being riddled with cracks, owning a run down 100 year old house (which is going to take valuable biking time to repair), the shortening days, the increasing amounts of rain making the trails boggy, the cracks in the head tube of my XC hardtail, feeling fat and slow from spending 5 weeks of the summer recovering from a groin injury and not being able to manual but after reading this lot I feel much better.
Time to go to the pub and enjoy an old man beer while planning which wet rooty trail to shred on my remaining bike down this weekend in my new waterproofs (the house can wait another few years I am sure)!
Spent all of last winter rehabbing my shoulder after an operation, only to get four races done to find out I was in a 1% category and the operation had failed. I then missed riding properly all Summer (including a trip to France). All whilst waiting for my next operation next week, which will once again put me fully out of action for a long time. NAE GID!
Cos i hate my job and my life. need something to look forward to.
I am miserable because I can’t afford to buy a TV license and so have watched every video on this website at least 5 times to try and entertain myself.
Last year i broke my collar bone and i still have to do physiotherapy after another fall i had in july where i broke my radius bone, big bummer, and when the doctors operated on me something went wrong and i wasn’t able to open my hand. I still don’t have a fully recovered hand and i have a big scar on my fore-arm with a hole where some muscle should be and plus i am still trying to correct the problems in my back that my collar bone caused… Still got quite a way to go… I was racing and was first in my category when i went through the qualifying split at the portuguese national champs… I’ve lately been looking for some motivation in getting back up and keep on going
I am miserable because i lost my gopro hero 2 whilst out riding and never found it
Didn’t realised how miserable I was until now! The poor summer has meant that I have spent more time on the road bike then the MTB I’m now starting to think I prefer the road bike over the MTB Nooooooo!
I’m flippin miserable because you won’t ship to the US.
I’m going to be even MOAR miserable because I’m gonna pay for the damn stamps and you are going to ship the miserable DVD to me.
Once it lands at my door step:
Happy
Happy
Joy
Joy
A few weeks ago I left my favorite gloves on the wheel of my almost new bike… but in the excitement to get out and ride I Picked up the bike and pedaled off as the gloves went through the rear mech destroying my mech, chain and mech-hanger! No ride, No gloves, No money, No bike. So a DVD would definitely help!
I came back from New Zealand after 3 years to find that the British summer is none existent. Working as a farmer and riding my bike, is utter shit when its pissing down. I need a copy of the dvd to stop me going insane and start killing the animals.
because my wife keeps telling me i am, and this’ll wind her up even more
I am all ways miserable and I am a big fan off the mighty Parmer as well ,i need to see this film fast I no the inspiring affect it will have on me like it did when I bought Chain Smoke in 97 !!!!
My only bike is a 2001 Stinky with questionable strength bars, but that doesn’t matter as I live in Pembrokeshire and there is no mountain biking of any note. The fuel for a trip to Brechfa bankrupts me for the month. My 6 year old son refuses to sleep by himself so me or the missus has to sleep on his floor every night. I’ve finished the last of the wine in the house and I have to guide some spanish kids who don’t give a shit around Pembroke castle tomorrow. My right sock has a hole in the heel.
cos i am a teacher init and i teach kids wot they shud no but theyz all nowz it already. plus itz in liverpool so kids are safe but not really. sound
Because jimmy fixed it for me
I’ve been living in Canada for a year, including 4 months of riding dust in Whistler, only to return home last week to what appears to be rain worthy of Noah. Not cool.
Because I’ve spent the entire summer getting my new acl and knee back into working order. It’s about time to party!
My wife wont let me drink more than 2 beers a day ,wont let me enter a winter enduro series ,wont let me by an enduro bike ,wont let me live…………..?
Im MISERABLE because I am in nursing school and do not get to ride my bike!!! Watching bike porn is my only salvation. Thank you.
I am a unhappy soul. I’m missing out on the SW champs, I can’t afford uplifts, I have no money for myself due the greed of the capitalist basturds, My bike is old my knees are knackered my shoulders are fecked, I’m 40 yrs old and look 25 but feel 60,and I seem to of gotten more rubbish on my bike dispite riding more. I could go on but I feel you’d of thought “what grumpy, miserable ol git he is by now”. Don’t get me started on Crimbo ,jimmy Savile, Or Lance Armstrong.
Oh i forgot to mention. I split up with my long term GF back July, Have ocd.
I’m miserable now because your only sending them to UK addresses , now I can’t win one.
Need that. Got a sore back and can´t even sit upright or take a deep breath, yet I´m at work on Satan´s very office chair that ruined my back. It´s actually a supposedly very comfy and back-friendly chair, which makes it even worse. I can´t ride this weekend because a) my back hurts b) I smashed my left in Legoland last week c) the girl is all about “spending time with each other” d) my ride is so worn it´s not even funny (boxxer´s twisted and motion control has fallen to pieces, BB is ruined, brakes are worn out, rear rim looks like a crisp, chain is rubbish and the hub bearings are done). I´m also very miserable b/c I just turned 30 and Palmer was the hero of my youth. I´m so miserable and desperate that I´ll even pay the stamps for a shipment to Germany in case you let this miserable being that is me win the DVD! (P.S.: My back hurts so much I´m gonna go home in a minute and cry like a Baby)
I’m so miserable I haven’t got the motivation to even make up a reason why I should get one.
I’ve weed my pants.
Because I went to McDonalds and ordered a breakfast wrap… they could not supply said wrap as they had no ‘folded eggs’. I replied, ‘well just put a normal egg on it then’, to which they simply replied ‘no we can’t’. Had to settle for a muffin and the lasting image of an overweight and miserable member of McDonalds staff. In turn this made me miserable. I pondered, ‘what would Palmer do?’
I can’t be arsed…………..
I used to get thrown in the cupboard alot as a child this is the first time im admitting to it i hold my bald head in misery tormented by the past. I also used to be a woman, on a journey for happiness i accidently ran my dog over. Shoot me now.
Because I’m the only miserable sod who said please?
i`m german… miserable enough? (i have a uk shipping address tought!)
Been off the bike so long I’ve got fat and get out of breath going up the stairs!
AND there’s no Friday randoms yet – sort it out Billy!
because i’ve just had an ACL reconstruction on my knee and im not aloud to ride for the rest of this year, and the start of next year which has made me very miserable

please
I’m miserable ‘cos I know that Jim Davage is going to stick my head up my arse (again) at the Southwest DH champs this weekend. Watching Palmer come second at too Are will cheer me up no end!
i am just generally miserable. mostly for the following reasons;
the weather
getting fat again
old
no time to ride
crap job
crap car
cant afford to go snowboarding
lack of vices in my life
skint
not enough shoes
knee hurts
tv sucks
house is a mess
cant have the radio on at work
spend my life making lists.
thats enough misery for anyone. even palmer couldnt take that.
I’m miserable because you wont send a copy of the DVD outside the UK.
Winning a copy would cheer me up no end and make me feel like a champion even if I had to send you the money for the extra stamps to send it to me here in New Zealand!!
I have just been diagnosed with a form of arthritis which affects my lower back. This arthritis has meant that I missed out on riding all summer because I sent most of it lying on the sofa in pain. It also means I’ve gotta take it easy on my bike now to protect my back (untill I can save up for a plush full sus frame!). But the worst thing is that because of the medication I’m now on I cant even drink!!! So having a DVD to watch would really cheer me up as I still cant get out on my bike yet.
Because I can’t tell tearful stories how my wife broke her leg and I had to work all day because I love her so much… Or my dog was hit by the car and was all over the place and I collected him and brought to vet… Bla bla bla. Those kind of stories always win the Dirt competitions, so I have no chances as usual.
My god there’s alot of miserable folk out there, hope you’re better for the weekend! I’ve picked 5 winners, just sent 4 DVDs out in the post waiting for an address from Mr Smedley.
Stay tuned for some more competitions coming soon!
because im a double arm amputee with crabs!!!
funny f**ker
Well, it’s the rain and the wind. And the wife keeps complaining about the wind. Shaun would keep me company whilst looking out the window and wondering where Summer went.
now I’m really miserable, missed the deadline!
Coz ive got school inspection next week so no riding this weekend andfora bonus reason tho not sad related I run a bike club at primary sc,hool and my kids kbow who gee gwinny and martyn ashton are!! Id look forward to educating them about the life of Mr Palmer!
To sum up, lost my job due to accident at work (oil rig)where I severed my ACL, tore my MCL and ripped the meniscus discs on my knee. Company wouldn’t pay for my treatment as I was on agency contract, lost my position and have been waiting for NHS since June. Been living on credit cards, taking contracts I am able to do. Last week my car had and still suffers from a expensive fault and my Bullmastiff has just undergone surgery (£££) and thankfully recovering well. All the progress I have made with work contracts is gone as I’ll be back in the game next year from scratch and I’ve been off my bike since may, been told I will not get on my bike until 6-9 months after my op, another summer gone. Oh, did I mention that just before my accident at work, my GF bought me a brand new 888 evo as it was freshly powedercoated and rebuilt with upgrades.. It’s sitting waiting for me, in the mean time I am living with constant frustration only distracted by my loving bullmastiff and girlfriends great company. Shaun Palmer is one of my heroes, I can relate to events in his life, the low points, the determination. Oh well..
Sorry, I ment my bike was repainted and upgraded for the fork that was bought.
COMPETITION CLOSED!!! I’ve picked the winners!
Since a couple of years I have chronic fatigue syndrome. Although I can barely ride I just can’t give up, even if this means being fucked for a week after 20 miles of riding…
I am miserable cos I have missed out on this
and my hubby is stuck watching the same old dvds hes watched for the past 3 years
Whaaaaat…, For feck sake, only posting to UK addresses…? of all the inconsiderate competitions to run, you reel me in with the promise of winning a dvd then shoot me down with the “price of stamps these days” being too dear.., c’mon Billy postage to Ireland isn’t that much…, you’ve made me miserable now….
Cheer me up with a dvd….
Just seen you closed the comp….now i’m even more miserable…..
HEY BILLY! the DVD is great thanks for being so speedy, i never knew how much i would like this but honestly Shan Palmer is my new found hero! I never took notice of him that much when the PS2 games were out but watchin this vid though made me realise just how many sports he was in that we have grown to love – a true legend, a great story.
I’ve wanked both my arms into a permanent state of cramp, meaning I can only ride in a speed tuck position. The torrent of abuse I receive from 16 year olds down the trails has left me completely fubared and with little choice but to remain indoors wanking. This has created a vicious circle which can only be broken by the arrival of a quality DVD in the post to distract me long enough for my arms to uncramp. Please billy, help me out.
proper cant be arsed to put the effort in, whatevs man
Rain and a thankless job led my utter idiots and bullys conspire against me riding. A DVD will cheer me up.
Because in the last three months I’ve had five days off work, haven’t seen my wife or kids at all…..haven’t been riding AT ALL. And now I have two weeks off work and guess what? I need to tile and paint the kitchen……replace the guttering and fascia. So what chance do I have to ride!?! Sometimes life just gets in the way.
Its SNOWING her in Norway,that makes mi misurable,I need
a copy to cheer me up!!
Miserable because first I had to send my shock back for a service then as soon as I got that back I had to send my hammerschmidt for service then while that is away my reverb arrived. I want to ride but bike is in bits! Miserable as sin!
Why huh? Why not pass it over. Early this summer we had a month of heavy rains turning our local riding spot into a nearly unusable heap of loose rock and deep rain ruts. Now it’s mid October and there is 6 inches of snow on the ground. Add that to the endless list of complaints I have and you’d be miserable too. What with todays youth, music going to hell, traffic getting worse and the environment falling apart, who’s not in a bad mood. Yes Billy I’m Miserable and nothing would help me wallow in self pity more then watching Shaun Palmer’s story. Now as I stand here at work watching the snow continue to fall, waiting on hold for a supplier who’s part numbers don’t match the pieces we order I see a faint glimmer of hope. Please Billy, bring me a smile, a long forgotten smile, some chance to shrug off this cold miserable day and remember that all is not lost.
The very fact that you have this competition available just adds to my misery there for making me even more misarable, as i know i wont win a copy of palmers dvd as i never win anything!!